


Only a week

by JesSkull



Category: Gintama
Genre: Angst, Death by Accident, F/M, Suicide Themes, really all this goes around suicide themes, short little fic?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-21
Updated: 2016-08-21
Packaged: 2018-08-10 04:59:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7831213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JesSkull/pseuds/JesSkull
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It has been just one week since the last time that he saw her, it has been just a week without her, without her light, without her smile… It has been just a week since her death…</p>
            </blockquote>





	Only a week

It has been just one week since the last time that he saw her, it has been just a week without her, without her light, without her smile… It has been just a week since her death…

It all happened so quickly, one day they were together being all happy, and the next he was alone. It was an accident, they all knew that well, she was just in the wrong place at the wrong moment, there was no one to blame, and especially him… Everyone tried to cheer him up, but they were as broken as he was, Kagura was more than a simple and normal girl to all them. A daughter, a friend, a sister, a lover, a light; she was much more than just a girl.

They tried hard, they told him that it was not his fault, no one could have guessed that an accident would happen right at where she was. But he knew that it was his fault, he was the one who made her wait there, he was the one who got late to that place, if only he could have gotten there faster… If only she would have arrived a second later… If only he could see her smile one more time…

But it was not possible, he knew that he just lost her forever, in a way, he was the one who killed her. It didn’t matter what Gintoki told him, how many times Kondo said that it was not his fault, how many times Hijikata tried to talk to him, he knew that he could have saved her.

Even her last message, 'you’re late Sadist >w<’, why did he have to get up late that day? Why did he have to lose her that way? They were only starting to be happy together, there were still so many things that they wanted to do together, so many things that he wanted to do with her, and now… It was simply impossible.

She was his everything, his reason to live, his reason to be a better man, and now she wasn’t there…  If that was their destiny, he would have preferred to not tell her about his feelings, if that could keep her alive, he would have preferred to step aside and just watch her smile from the shadows. She was happy before him, she could have found someone else, and she would be alive now.

It was his fault… “I’m sorry…” The tears were falling without control, if only he hadn’t fallen in love with her, if only he had just accepted on being friends with her, if only he hadn't told her to be there… She could be there with him, talking with GIntoki, showing her bright light to others in the world.

No… She was happy with him, right? She always had that beautiful smile every time that they saw each other, she even had one when he got in that place, when the blood was on the floor and the tears were falling, she still smiled when she saw him, she had a nice smile when the last breath escape her body, she had that beautiful smile when her eyes closed to never open again.

“I’m sorry.” He repeated while getting closer to the cliff, the memories, all the precious times they spent together, being without her was impossible. Not seeing her, not hearing her laugh, behind left alone in a world without her… How was he supposed to go on? The guilt, hearing Gintoki crying in the nights, seeing them put fakes smiles even if they were broken, there was no way he could continue, even if they didn’t blame him, even if she died with a smile, he blame himself… “I’m so sorry.” He thought with tears rolling down his face before jumping.


End file.
